Why I'm a Pro-Government

Salaamu`alaikum warahmatullah ... today, 7.30 sharp; I will be going to Khalifa Institute to attend a seminar about 'Khalifah in Teaching Sector' <something like that-lah>. Well, I have been anticipating to get involve into things like that, considering that my leadership is in GRAVE shallow. Two inches shallow <imagine that??>

Talking about khalifah

Recently on Facebook, I spent a large chunk of my pathetic, teenage life to some debates, focusing on Islamic leadership. Since I am pro-Government, I had to answer countless accusations, slanders and attend an endless chain of arguments with them <the Opposition>. About the hudud case, specifically.

It have been quite a controversy about how, when and why this educational methodology <I prefer not calling it punishment>  should be implemented. The Opposition gives no space for people like me to talk about it, and they merely but abusing it again, and again, and again, as a modal to attract voters. They may have lied thousands or probably millions, but not me <not yet??>

Hududallah

Abu Syafiq in his writing criticized how the Opposition made fool of Allah's law by trading with votes. They said, "We will implement hudud", and used Tun Dr. Mahathir's objection letter sent to Tuan Guru Nik Aziz, to explain why their State Government didn't execute the said laws. Well hell. Tun Dr. Mahathir have retired like eight years ago. Why should the letter be considered as the refutation of hudud? <I invited one pro-Opposition to debate with me. Right until now, he's in total silence. Gahh>

The next thing was, they used the video of Datuk Seri Najib bin Tun Abdul Razak saying, "UMNO is nowhere near to implement hudud ..." as a second contention to strengthen their stand. I'd say this, too,  was proven to be a very futile argument because it is cropped; the video. A pro-UMNO debater, well-known by the name PDS stated that in full-length video, Datuk Seri Najib did say things in accordance to the maqasid syar`iyyah. That was a turning point for some other participating debaters ... <so pathetic for the Opposition>.

I have errands, so let us just skip through and make conclusion ...

BN didn't implement hudud, because they know the difficulties of doing so in this multicultural mass. We need to teach the citizens first about this hukum, before we blindly implement it. It's a taboo for Malaysians for such things to happen. I personally, am a hudud struggler, I have debated with atheists about this issue some several hundreds hours. I say this is the best law there is.

I 1000% support hududallah. Problem?

Opposition is  aesthetically rhetoric and proactive in fighting for hudud. But, they forget one hadeeth, recorded by Saidina `Ali Karamallahu Wajhah about a greater priority in Islam. Unification. This is what they lack. The are subversive, divisive and yet still- without any embarrassment whatsoever, not even a smudge- they declare themselves jundullah. They know not if hudud is to be implemented, the first criminal that should be executed are of their own people; the Mujassimites, the Taimiyyites who say Allah as having mass, corners and vertices, and asserted Allah is doing 'istiwa in a literal sense. Na`udzubillah. Subhanallahi amma yushrikuun.

Want to know who are the Mujassimites? Check it out yourself

You shan't use hudud as goods to trade with. It's Allah's Right, and you can't just bargain it for some few thousands votes. All in all: "Alaih sallahu biahkamil hakimiin". Allah Punishes the transgessors, remember this. Wassalam

Efek 'Close to Nature'

Salaam all. A very good break of dawn, I bid to you all, fellow faithful readers. This entry is simple, it's tutorial about yet another wonderful effect that can be done using Photoscape v3.5. Ohh, I love this software eve more, each day. The effect is called 'Close to Nature', as it performs to emphasize the value of nature in photos. Commands are under the pictures. But first, an example:

1. Open Photoscape, open picture/photo <make sure that the photo/picture is taken in nature, green landscape>
2. Bright, Color > Deepen > Middle
3. Bright, Color > Decolor > -2
4. Filter > Movie Effects > Cinema > High
5. Filter > Texture > line_vertical.jpg
6. Filter > Fade Style > Color 83, Level 82%-100%

For this picture, I set the Level of Fade Style to 100% <the greener the picture, the lesser the Level>

MUET Speaking (Request Akhi Dr. Wawan)

Sekali-sekala, seronok mengembara alam semesta.

Salaam all. How's life been? Gahh. Today I wanna share to you about my first experience taking MUET <ini bukan atas dasar syok sendiri, tahu. Ada permintaan. Seriously>. Akhi, I hope you're reading this and be my witness. I have fulfilled you wish.

First time

Believe it or not, it's my very first experience taking MUET. Some of my senior classmates, or should I say, OLDER classmates have taken theirs during matriculation/university/whatsoever. But then, as MUET certificate expires after five years, they need to re-take it. Sodih!

Anyhow, for me:- it's something I have no experience with. I'm still a suckling in education profession, and by that, it is fair for you to justify how clumsy and erratic I am in certain things, that regard to this. The last time I took test as such was on 2009, conducted by our beautiful English teacher, Miss Diana Theresa Otigil, in short; Miss D. I got quite a low mark and that is pathetic. Gahh.

Preparation

If you ask me about my preparation before walking into the test room, ask no more. I hate myself, I rarely spend time to do linguistic exercises, though knowing that mine language level is below mediocre. Huhuu-- typical Yassin and his lame-shits of unconsciousness.

A week before the test, I did have several exercises with my friends. I was quite passive, merely listened to what they said. Like I have stated before in many previous posts, I am more to listening than speaking. I guess, that's what hold my tongue back, every time people ask about something. So often did the cat got my tongue. UGH. Hate cats.

There were so many topics that had been put forward as our subject of argument. These friends; these guys, the way they interact constantly reminded of my fellow in MRSM two years ago. Well, they <my colleagues are certainly irreplaceable,  but one thing is sure; they all want me to go on <how did I- ahh, *wiping tears*>

So, the day came ...

Sun was yet to ablaze, and I had already finish my routine in break of dawn; praying, bathing, taking breakfast and doing light exercise <I wanna get rid of this lemaxx!>. I calmed myself down, stabilizing my breath so in the hall, I won't have any unnecessary anxiety. And surprisingly, i worked! <By Allah's permission, obviously>.

One thing that I wanna tell you <those who are yet to take MUET>, is, pray. Seriously, it helsp like hell. Again, LIKE HELL! When you have no power or feel too weak to overcoe something that is of your obligations, remember God. This is my secret <heck. I talked like Dr. H.M. Tuah Iskandar>

We were the last session, and I was put into the first group that was being called upon. I trembled a bit, that's natural, but managed to keep myself intact. Two examiners were sitting with curve-ups on their faces. We felt very much, welcomed and invited. And so, that helped us to get through the ordeal faster and smoother. Our question was:

'What profession deserves higher salary?'
a. Football player <I wonder why didn't they call it 'footballer'>
b. Singer
c. Nurse
d. Policeman

I was Candidate B, and seeing Candidate A and his fluency in voicing his ideas, words and wisdom I shrunk on the chair. Everyone looked massive and stern, and gazing me with those fiery eyes <well, hyperbole much??>. Gahahahh-- sorry, I lied.

Actually, they were supremely courteous, warm and contented. They; all of 'em; the invigilators, candidates and even lizards on the ceiling acted beautifully. Task B was a breeze, but Task A? Gahh. That's the only word that I could say. 

Is it hard or the opposite?

These are my friends ... but still, you're above them, akhi.

Frankly ... it's easy-peasy. I tried to be as critical and as interactive as I could, but just couldn't do that well <at least I talked, like, endlessly?? Agagaga>. Singer was the hardest premise, I tell you. I- ...I was- like- .. humm ... I sucked. My last point was significantly irrational and incoherent to the topic

"My third reason is, because singers <OMG, I said 'artists' on the real test. Just realized it. Ohhh!!!> is ironically a risky job. I mean, they have to face a lot of scandals and controversies, and for that, I think they deserve more ..."

Ahohoho KASK.

YATTA!!!  

Finally, after those twenty agonizing minutes, I made my way out of the hall and directly jumped on my bed. Snoring, snoring like a baby ... <heh, sleepyhead :P>. Yup... that has gotta be me.

Wawan, this is all I can offer you. Thanks for requesting, and next up: I'll be telling the story about us in MRSM. you know ... TF1, FF17 stuff. Just wait, wouldya?

Efek 'Just Nice'

Salaam. Selamat pagi, kawan-kawan ... hari nikan, saya macam mau tutor-kan <behh, macam pro jaa> satu efek yang kamu boleh guna untuk mencantikkan lagi mana-mana gambar portrait yang kamu ada <esp., yang already huduh gila-gila punya portrait>. Agagagaga -- I kid. 

Baiklah, saya mau kasi tengok dulu kamu contoh untuk dijadikan rubrik <di bawah gambar tu, ada commandment untuk efek> Kalau kamu nampak efek neh nice, bhaa, guna. Saya namakan efek neh, efek 'Just Nice'. Agagaga -- ehh, ndaksalah bha, commandment efek neh, saya yang reka <hah, baru sikit sudah ria'>. OK-lah, ini gambarnya:

Memandangkan kakak saya paling tante', saya jadikan dia model. Agagaga -- sorry Kak, ndak mintak kebenaran.

1. Buka Photoscape, dan buka gambar potret yang ingin di-edit <pastikan gambar potret, sebab kalau selain itu, ndak jadi>. Berada dalam tab Home.
2. Bright, Colour > Deepen > Middle
3. Filter > Noise Reduction > Middle
4. Filter > Film Effect > Cinema > Middle <bergantung dengan lighting gambar>
5. Filter > Film Effect > Velvia > Low 
6. Filter > Film Effect > Provia > Low
7. Filter > Graduated Tint > letakkan crosshair warna oren tu pada dagu potret. Pastikan, Feather: 50; Shade: 40
8. Filter > Film Effect > Agfa > High 
9. Bright, Color> Colorize > Pick any color < highly recommended: 20>. Pastikan Saturation: 153; Level 33
10. Filter > Fade Style > Pilih warna yang sama dengan warna yang kamu guna untuk 'Colorize'. Level: 15%
11. Letaklah aksesori, clip art atau apapun
12. Siap dihidang <uishh, macam buat kuih pulak>. Another example:

Sorry jugak Dien ... malas cari subjek lain.

I Love Photoscape

Salaam. Have I ever told you guys how much I love 'Photoscape'? ... You can do almost a million modifications with it. I've been using it quite awhile, and so far, I'm totally satisfied with its performance. Kudos to 'Photoscape' creator. Here's a several photos which I have edited using the said software. Now, judge as you will

Mr. Crab Si Penceroboh

"I smell money!!" *sneaking*

"Oohh.. me darling. There you are..." *goin' crazy*

"Yippeyy!!! Yippeyy!!" *heaven*

20 Ciri Lelaki Ubërseksual (iii)

Salaam. Fuhh~lega gila neh. MUET sudah habis, dan berlangsung dengan cemerlang. Candidates sepasukan semuanya pintar dan agak hebat dalam melontar hujah, esp., my batch-mate: Izzat Idrus. Well, he's a TESLian, what more could you expect. Gahh- rasa tercabar.

Anyway, tadi ada part yang bikin malu neh masa buat task A. Semua candidates <kecuali saya> menyokong dua usul/indicators/points. Saya jaa termengah-mengah memenangkan satu. Habes malu: gahh lupakan. <And if you guy're questioning what topic that we accomplished earlier, its about salary- I mean, who deserves a better pay><saya candidate B dengan point singer><hell, susah gila cari reasons>.

Oh waiiiii..... 

Sebelum kita sesat merayap lagi jauh, baik saya hentikan quarrel neh. Teda maknanya, sudah lepas. Tajuk pos mencadangkan benda lain, saya tulis benda lain. Gahh:- paling senanglah dipengaruhi emosi. OK-lah, kita sambung sekuel terakhir untuk pos bersiri '20 Lelaki Ubërseksual' <points dia banyak sangatlah, penat komen>.

16. Intelligence is the new sexiness

Are dexterity and intelligence count as the factor of being a dream guy? Gahh. If so, then why are all the professors and savants died alone on their beds? Just asking. HeHeHe >:D

"Intelligence isn't everything, b'coz everything is love."

Saya setuju dengan point ini. Seperti yang saya katakan dalam pos sebelum neh, materialisme adalah pengukur cinta zaman sekarang. Dan kebijaksanaan adalah satu-satunya jalan yang menjamin ke arah itu. Kebijaksanaan di universiti, maktab dan institusi lainnya secara lazim menjanjikan peluang kerja yang lebih luas.

When we see this in a positive manner, I could barely say that i.o to have a family, men nowadays have to be supremely educated and this create that sense of competition in terms of achievement. And if you think I'm exaggerating, look around you, peeps.

And most people also say that intelligent guys are rather geek weirdos, and freakish being. Yet, they have the sense of romanticism. Well, if you ask me, I couldn't imagine how a button-up guy with two thick, big magnifying glasses can be romantic. It's subjective, isn't it? HAHAHA :D

17. Sukakan perkara feminin, walaupun gaya lelaki sejati

Lelaki sekarang neh, saya ndaktaulah... suka benda yang ndak-ndak. Kalau suka layan 'Playboy' tu, OK lagi <actually not>. Ini:- pakai baju ketat sampai nampak one pack HAHAHA. One pack, do you get me? One pack?? <DUH, joke failed. Epic failed>.

And to add to that weirdness, women nowadays prefer men with pink, tight shirt. Saya kata, hell. Samalah macam kalau perempuan pakai baju lelaki, ndakkah pelik? Anywa, we have our own understanding about being pink.

Lelaki yang suka/pandai menggubah bunga, memasak, mencuci baju, mengemas tempat tidur dan menjaga baby ada dua kemungkinannya: sama ada dia 'jambu' <tak kuasa I~> atau epal. HaHaHa, gurau. Atau  mereka memang bertanggungjawab dan sedia menjalankan tugas sebagai suami dan ayah <tapi, lelaki neh pandai berlakon tauu... depan ibu mentua baik gila, pijak semutpun, ketawa semut. Inipun yang saya nampak di TV-lah. Jangan percaya sangat.

Yeah... that's right.

But for me, as a man- woman who does manly things and yet, still having that of feminine stuffs are the sexiest being. She can argue with me whilst having dishes in her hands, to be washed. I like dominant woman~ <serius goli gila. Ihh, ndak gengster bha>. 

Bagi saya, teda masalahlah dengan lelaki yang suka benda feminin neh, yang penting kelelakian terjaga. Habes kalau lembut telampau, senang di-control isteri. OH NO. They sure are hot, btw. At least, that's what I could conclude based on my observation with my fellow friends.

18. Suka cari pasal

Lelaki yang suka cari pasal neh begini; kalau dorang bosan kan, dorang ambil bantal dan smack benda tu ke muka isteri dia. Gahh. Mesti si isteri geram tu, kan? Jadi dia serang balas dengan marah sungguh-sungguh. Dorangpun berlawan pillow fight, berlari dalam sekeliling rumah, saling mengejar antara satu dengan yang lain. Habis bantal berhamburan, bulu-bulu pelepah bertaburan. Bila si isteri kejar suami, si suami jatuh, dan si isteri jatuh di atas suaminya. Mereka berpandangan, dan ...

... ada orang ketuk pintu. Mereka saling bertukar senyum, dan si isteri bingkas bangun, membuka pintu. Laa, mak mentua dia. Dia cepat-cepat cium tangan emak dan si suami pulak cepat-cepat bergegar menyalam emaknya. Si emak senyum, mulut memuncung ke rambut si isteri ... rupanya ada bulu pelepah yang melekat. Cepat-cepat dia kasi lari. Ehh!? Waiiiiii....

Gahh. Where have I been? OK- kita mula balik. Bagi saya, lelaki yang cari pasal dan akhirnya end up giving up in a manly state is quite ... I dunno. You ask the girls-lah! But it shows friendliness, if you insist me to answer.

19. Pandai membuat kerja-kerja rumah

Hilang ke-macho-an. No good, sir!

Instead of being called as feminine and suave, women in majority prefer this type of man more, at least via my own dialogues with my girl pals. They said that men who possess this quality sure have their places in every today's women's hearts. I'm not quite sure about this, as I frankly think house chores are supposedly a women's duty. 

Kalaulah pandai melakukan kerja di rumah itu melambangkan ke'hangat'an seorang lelaki, maka, Rasulullah SAWS adalah lelaki terhangat. Baginda selalu memabntu `Aisyah r.a memasak, baginda menjahit pakaiannya sendiri, bahkan berpuasa jika Aisyah tidak memasakkan sesuatu untuk beliau. Kerana dalam Islam, memasak bukan kewajiban seorang wanita.

Again, religion proved to be more optimistic in marriage. Saya bercakap dalam general sense; a sense as a normal man. This demonstrates that men have no excuse of forcing women to do what they want and they desire.

20. Sukar difahami adalah suatu rupa yang mengancam

Gahh. Koreans are the truest form of jambu <though I am a big fan of their dramas>

Kenapalah point neh makin lama, makin mengarut. Bagaimana pula dengan ini? Hmm ... agak-agaklah bha, kalau menulis idea. Ini mesti penulisnya tengah boring and then jotted down something a weird as this. Gahh- hard time mate, hard time ... 

Anyway, to respond to this, it would probably fair if I use the same way guys see girls. Kira bertimbal-baliklah, kan? OK-lah, kita mulakan. Bagi lelaki; perempuan yang misterius, pendiam dan kurang ramah adalah yang paling menarik. Ada sensualiti yang cukup tinggi. Mereka biasanya lebih bersopan santun dan bertamadun; so many things we can explore about 'em, in a spiritual sense, and so many that we can learn from their mysteries. Sebab itu saya lebih suka perempuan seperti 'Emily The Strange'. Gahh.

Kesimpulan

Banyak gila benda yang ndak disebut oleh si penulis yang amat penting untuk ditekankan. Semnagat mengambil berat, prihatin, rajin SMS, komited dan banyak lagi teda di-mention. Ndapalah, mungkin author dia nampak segala nilai tu terlalu klise untuk disebut berulang-ulang kali. Mungkin dia ingin memberikan nafas baru, atau pandangan baru. Who knows?

Kesimpulannya, machismo, ketampanan, kekiutan, keanggunan, kehebatan, keromantikan, kebaikan, keseksian dan ke-hot-an <teruknya asimilasi> adalah bergantung sepenuhnya kepada seseorang. Pemerhatian dan penilaian adalah subjektif dan sangat abstrak untuk ditemukan titik samanya. Saya menghormati pandangan penyenarai neh, dia memang ada suatu identiti dalam pengamatannya. Saya ndak bilang dia salah, btw.

Sayapun, ada jugak cacat-cela dalam menilai neh, pandai-pandailah kamu menilai. Bak kata urang Putih, "Beauty lies in the eyes of beholder". Wassalam.

Unreleased Photos (Saja Jaa: Kurangkan Tekanan)

Salaam. Gahh. Ke-cuak-an melanda diri ini. MUET akan berlaku sejam 30 minit dari sekarang. Sudahlah semua candidates senior. Tapi ndapaa, latihan saya rasa dusah cukup and for that; thanks to all my friends who have been supporting me <esp., those who involved in MUET practices with me>.

Bencinya jadi kumpulan terlambat. Doakan saya berjaya dan dapat band cemerlang -- band empat pun, jadilah.

20 Ciri Lelaki Ubërseksual (ii)

Adakah anda semua bersedia???

Salaam. Huh-- ada sepuluh lagi poin yang perlu dikomen. It's going to be a very long night for me KASK. Ndapa:- ganbatte!!! <Padahal esok MUET. InshaAllah, sudah training beberapa hari lepas. Dapat band 3, OK-lah sudah>.

Oh, jap... saya mau tambah announcement. Malam neh, saya tulis dan komen lima points dan selebihnya esok <OK tak?? OK.... <cara Ooi>>. Nice. Next up to be a ubersexual man:

11. Maskulin/berotot

Cute ... <lucu tengok badannya oversized baju tinju> XD

Well, this seemingly is more about the physical instinct <sila jadi matang>. Seperti yang kita tahu, sesuatu organisma yang bersaing dengan spesis lain akan sentiasa berusaha untuk mencari pasangan yang dirasakan oleh mereka sebagai terbaik. Hal ini bagi memastikan agar baka dan keturunan spesis lahir dalam keadaan yang baik, dari baka yang sihat. Dalam darah manusia, ada jugak sifat haiwani ini, ianya digelar nafsu.

Wanita lebih suka lelaki berotot kerana bagi mereka, these guys can give them some sorts of comfort and warmth every time something bad is trying to disturb her. A robust man does give even to male that sense of protection. But sadly, most of the time; men with hard packs also have hard-boiled heart. Most of the time, they don't have emotional equilibrium and can get enraged just seconds after an intense debate takes place.

12. Kaya

I have thick wallet and nice tuxedo. What's next?

Dunia ini memang ndak dapat ditolak dari keinginan lahiriah. Pada lapisan masharakat manapun kita, desakan harta dan kemewahan kita menjadi umpama sebuah perang saga yang tidak henti-henti. Kejayaan golongan kapitalis telah berjaya mencemar pandangan manusia <esp., orang Malaysia> dengan suntikan materialisme yang tiada jedanya <I sound like History lecturer> -- dan ketakutan kita terhadap sikap resistans kepada kapitalisme menjadikan kita selamanya tergari pada keperluan materii. Wanita- seperti yang kita tau, punya banyak cita-cita dan keinginan.


Serius dalam segala benda dan sangat berfikir dalam pasal masa depan mereka <lelaki buat cool jaa pasal masa depan>.  Perempuan selamanya: belum capai umur 20 tahun, sudah uruskan bajet harian keluarga untuk membina rumah tangga. Gahh, WOMEN!

Bukan mau tuduh sembarangan, tapi atas dasar inilah kadang-kadang, perempuan pilih cash love. Ndak kisahlah umur seabad beza, yang penting dapat kikis harta. But then, not all. And but then, more than the minority of women would choose a man whose financial state is stable.

13. Muzikal/Literatur

Salah satu atribut Hawa adalah mereka suka dibelai dan dipuja dengan kata-kata hiperbola dn metafora. "Kaulah bulanku," dan "Kan kurenangi jurang angkasa demi memetikkanmu sebutir bintang" adalah dua contoh. Walaupun mereka tau si lelaki ndakkan pernah mampu merenangi ruang angkasa tadi, perempuan terbabit tetap akan rasa bersyukur dengan kesanggupan si lelaki untuk berjanji.

Lelaki yang meminati sastera selalunya bersikap misterius.

Dan mereka yang punya kemahiran sastera atau muzikal ndakkan masalah dalam kes neh. Mereka pandai menyusun kata, merenggut kesadaran si Hawa dalam beberapa ketika. Ekspresi secara sastera dan muzikal adalah nilai tambah seorang lelaki sempurna yang menunjukkan bahawa dia akan melakukan apapun demi korang <gurls, listen up!>.

14. Keturunan ternama

Yang Mulia Putera Charles

Ada jugak lelaki yang diminati atas dasar nepotisme <dalam konteks perhubungan>. Mereka dicintai atas dasar ingin mewarisi harta diraja dan memiliki sebuah mahkota berlian 200 karat. Alaa, macam dalam wayang  Indonesia tu bhaa. Aha; macam tulah. Sekadar ingin membolot kekayaan.

Well, if we put this in reality, it seems to be the opposite. Some would say that princes, any prince- will always be the most charming personalities on Earth. Their unpolluted skin, their constantly moisturized facial, their solid body due to free, royal training; all blend into something that we always call as beauty. A beautiful man.

Keturunan ternama lebih melibatkan ibu bapa, kerana merekalah yang menentukan pasangan hidup anak mereka. Contoh, "Ehh, baik kau kahwin dengan anak si Raden Wijaya daripada kau memilih Abdul si nelayan. Ibu bapa lebih matang, maka berbincanglah dengan mereka jika tiada keputusan yang menepati keinginan anak saya.

15. Serupa artis kegemaran

Ini adalah trend perempuan sekarang. Kalau mau cari BF melalui Facebook, habis dipulun semua gambar profil, diselak seluruh album untuk memastikan rupa mengatasi standard seorang artis favourite. Lepas tu, kalau sudah layak, di-chat, ditabur janji, saling menguntai kata-kata. Sampai ke syurgalah, sampai ke hujung dunialah bercinta. Mereka tau bahawa mereka saling menipu diri-sendiri, just i.o that they can get that Korean-looking guy.

Hot stuff hari neh, jika kau bukak balik gambar pada zaman kecilnya, ndak lebih dari seorang kanak-kanak yang ndakda ilmu esok dan semalam. Kapitalisme, dan sentimen budaya yang menyebabkan mereka berpindah pusat. Sang lelaki terpaksa bergaya mengikut arus, jika ndakmau tenggelam dengan kemodenan dan materialisme.

Lelaki yang sekadar memenuhi paras indah saja, yang sekadar menyalakan lampu skala ke-handsome-an pada tingkat yang memuaskan ndakkan mampu dibahagiakan mahupun membahagiakan. Hot stuff yang kita cari adalah mereka yang mampu untuk sedaya-upaya menyeimbangkan fizikal, spiritual dan mental. Ingat: macam mana kacakpun suamimu, ia tidak boleh menyuapkan kau dengan sesudu nasi. Perlu usaha, ini aturan alam!

Kesia-siaan

Tunggu, yah!

Salaam. Kita berhenti rehat dulu dari sekuel kedua '20 Ciri Lelaki Ubërseksual', yah! Dengar dulu bisik hati saya <sengaja saya tulis bold>.

Alhamdulillah... beberapa hari ini, saya diuji dan diuji lagi. Saya sudah masak dengan kerenah hidup neh, saya kira. Didikan ayah ibu dan panduan Al-Qur`an yang berterusan meneguhkan pendirian saya, menjadi aset kebangkitan. Dugaan baru-baru ini saya rasakan amat berat. Huh~

Anak saudara...

Kadang-kadang, saya rasa mustahil juga untuk bertahan dengan sepak terajang minda dari orang lain ke saya. Yang diperlekeh itu bukan zahir, melainkan jiwa dan prinsip saya. Ndapalah, semoga Allah menyedarkan orang-orang sedemikian.

Saya selalu bertanya kepada diri, kenapa terlalu takut untuk berhadap semuka dengan orang yang engkau ada konflik... kenapa saya terlalu pengecut untuk cuba mencungkil kemungkinan yang sudah terang-terang terhidang peluangnya di depan mata. Sebenarnya, kamu tidak akan faham. Kamu tidak lalui apa yang saya terpaksa lalui untuk terus menjadi manusia.

Saya- seperti yang kamu tahu, adalah manusia hiper-sensitif dan sangat tidak ekspresif <melainkan di dalam blog>. Saya hanya tahu menangis dan menangis di dalam kamar sendirian, dan bila orang mengetuk pintu bilik, saya cepat-cepat lap air mata.

Kadang-kadang, saya rasa itu egoisme yang membendung diri dari memperkatakan apa yang patut saya perkatakan. Kalaulah kamu tahu betapa perit saya bunuh diri saya berulangan kali, menghijab realiti dengan jerit kehendak hati- pasti kamu turut menangis. Saudara sekelas, Arif pernah nasihat,

 "Kalau kau mampu lepasi semua tu, bukan maksudnya kau malang. Maksudnya kau sangat kuat. Kalau aku di tempat kau, mungkin aku dah takde dah!"

Nasib baik ada kawan-kawan yang membantu saya mengharungi hidup.

Saudara, terima kasih atas motivasi. Tapi itupun belum cukup untuk menghentikan tangisan saya bila terkenangkan betapa bertuahnya orang sekeliling dengan kemewahan serta kehebatan mereka. Betapa saya terbeban sangat-sangat dengan rasa cemburu sebagai manusia yang punya banyak cia-cita; Saya tabahkan ini juga. Namun umpama empangan, kadang-kadang air mata akan berderai juga. 

Saya selalu pujuk diri untuk tidak mengeluh, kerana mengeluh itu tandanya tiada kesyukuran. Mengeluh itu tanda kita lemah mengalah. Tidak mungkin ahsani takwiim seperti saya <dan kamu semua>boleh dikalahkan dengan kehendak membuta. Bil saya fikir balik semua ni, saya cepat-cepat lap air mata. Saya bisik, 

"Bukan ini caranya!"

Tadi pagi, saya bentak lagi diri sebab saya sudah mensia-siakan sesuatu yang sangat bernilai. Atas memoribilia tiga tahun lepas, saya undur setapak kebelakang dan amalkan prinsip orang `Arab, yakni 'berikan kepada mereka yang lebih mahu dan lebih layak' Saya hanya mampu melihat ianya berundur dengan wajah marah disia-siakan. Menjauh dari saya.

OK-lah

Maafkan saya ya, kawan. Sebab kamu terpaksa mendengar kesia-siaan ini. Hidupilah hidup kamu, bernafaslah dengan ceria. Jangan jadi seperti saya yang menyerahkan diri pada kelemahan dan akhirnya hilang arah tuju. Wassalam...

20 Ciri Lelaki Ubërseksual (i)

Salaam semua. Harini saya mau kongsi satu sesuatu berkenaan lelaki. Well, if you can manipulate it somehow, you may get some advantages, like for women; they can use this as guidance to look up for their life partner, and men can follow this list to be a hot stuff <seemingly>.

NadJoliey pernah menulis dalam blognya pasal 'Facts About Girls?: Let's See Berapa Yang Kena'. It is quite an interesting thing to be read with a mug of coffee in hand. To be pondered upon, to be implemented. Memang kebanyakan fakta pasal wanita yang dia tulis berlawanan dengan persepsi saya sebelum neh. 

So, lemme counter her entry. We'll see which gender is weirder. Gahahah. OK-lah, be serious. Uhm <tarik nafas dan lepaskannya, merasionalkan pemikiran>. Saya ada terbaca bha, somewhere somehow these points about man. I mean, about true man and what kind of man women crave for <macam pelik jaa "crave for" o.O>. Saya mau komen, and kongsi pendapat.

1. Tanned-skinned man is way sexier

Well, this seems to be a bit apartheid. Sebenarnya, point neh bergantung kepada faktor budaya dan negara jugak bhaa. In Korea, for instance; they adore men with tanned skin, instead of white beings. Albeit we here lionize them for their whiteness, we here have been envied for such beautiful skin. Orang kata sawo matang dan hitam manis. It's all about Sod's Law, right?

Dalam negara kita, terdapat jugak sebahagian wanita yang prefer tanned-skinned men. They think it is cool to have a tall man of that type, sebab lelaki yang berkulit putih ternyata nampak agak "auwwwiiyy!" dan djambu. Gahh <sorry farahida ibrahim, BF kau gagal point pertama>.

2. Lelaki yang berbutang baju sehingga ke atas sekali nampak provokatif

Imma nerd, and I buttoned my shirt up to the top... problem??

Waahahah. Lucu oh, neh fakta. Kalau macam neh, saya seksilah tuu <gahh. :D> I'm not sure about it's validity and the truth behind it, but lets just assume it is true. What can we extract out of it?

Well, as far as I could think of, man who button his shirt up to the top is rather conservative/secretive. They hide 'something', and won't let others see what he has under his sleeve. Some suggests this man is typical of having pets or liking children, not because of wanting to have one. But affection. They simply like children. But ultimately, it's up to their reason in being so. I mean, buttoning up.

Going back to the point, I bet it does not happen in our society. Orang Malaysia lebih beranggapan bahawa pemakaian sedemikian sebagai polos dan kolot, ketinggalan zaman yang memang tidak mengikut arus perdana. Gahh. Hard time for those Malaysians who like to button up.

3. The hottest man is the one that will never touch you, until he got your ringer with silver ring 

Indeed. In Islam itself, we're allowed to touch ajnabi ONLY when we have married that particular girl. Proposal is not valid enough to be used as reason to verify our lust upon the said girl. Saya terbayangkan begini bhaa: kalau sudah pasti itu jodoh, kenapa perlu bertindak terburu-buru, memegang sana-sini? Bolehkan, buat benda tu lepas kahwin nanti.

The logic behind 'men fumbling over' is that, those men are not ready yet to take you as their partner. They know the relationship won't last and are afraid that they may leave without having/enjoying something in the girl. It's hard to find a male of such who will never take any physical and financial advantages from you <girl>.

4. Lelaki yang unik: tersenyum dalam keletihan dan menangis ketika perlu

Saya ndakdapat bayangkan oh, lelaki macam neh. Tersenyum dalam keletihan tu OK lagi, boleh lagi komen sikit-sikit. Tapi kalau menangis tu, bukan childish-kaa? <blurred>. OK-lah, I'll try to comment as reasonable as I can.

Lelaki yang tersenyum meskipun seharian bekerja/belajar/berjalan melayan naluri ber-shopping perempuan adalah mereka yang sangat komited dan tolak-ansur. Percayalah, lepas kahwin nanti, mereka akan jalankan tugas dengan sangat baik, bahkan akan membantu isteri mengemas rumah dan memasak <guhh. Memang bukan ciri saya LOL>. Bila berkeringat begitu, isteri tanyak, "Abang penat tak?". Kalau dia unik, maka dia akan tersenyum sambil menggeleng instead of saying, "Yaa.." atau "Tidak, sayang. Perkare kecik jee...".

Lelaki yang sebenar, IOW, maskulin ndakkan menahan emosinya, bagi memelihara keegoan. Meluahkan emosi melalui tangisan dan ketawa kuat adalah tanda bahawa mereka tidak dipengaruhi oleh dunia sekitar; they have their respective thought about how life should be and what it should mean. Unprovoked and stern. 

"Hahaha.. buruknya rupa dia nangis!", as to some would say <me too ;P>
<gahh, people's thougts. You could never satisfy 'em. Just cry, if you need to.

A man with this sort of attribute will have no problem building their own life. They know the bounds and limits, and they have no problem of adhering to the most recent renewal of it. In marriage, they can control emotion and not getting into outrageous state easily <gahh. Hate abusive men>.

5. Men are way hotter if they put God before anything

Yaa... cuba kamu tanya perempuan di luar sana bhaa, apa pengertian berpasangan buat mereka. Majoriti akan jawa, "Untuk memimpin saya" atau, "Untuk membawa saya ke syurga" atau, "Untuk mendidik saya" dan sebagainya yang mempunyai konotasi serupa. Ndak kiralah bagaimana rock atau grunge-nya seorang wanita, semuanya yang begitu pasti menjadikan perkahwinan sebagai jalan untuk mula berbuat baik; mula menambah iman dan bertanggungjawab. Ada bhaa, satu saying ni:

"Marriage is the end of life for men and the beginning for women"

Gahahh. Second thought, it's rather true. Perempuan neh, mereka lemah, perlukan perlindungan berterusan dari lelaki. Yang mampu menyelamatkan mereka adalah keegoan lelaki. Keegoan itu pula perlu dikawal <kalau ndak, habes dideranya isteri>, dan agama menyediakan undang-undang tertentu dalam mengawal keegoan itu.

So yeah, religion is part of a sexy man.

Ashraff Muslim is the best model for all young Malaysian male artists to follow. He's kinda religious. Well, kinda.

6. Lelaki yang seksi adalah lelaki yang membuatmu teruja bukan dengan sentuhan manja dan bisikan asmara, tetapi kata-kata biasa.

Gahh. Ini point buat saya rasa loya dan tidak berdaya. Bukan sebab terasa, tapi frasa tu bha... "sentuhan manja"?? "Bisikan asmara???? What the he-!?!? Anywa, saya perlu komen jugaklah, just to be fair with all the points.

Bagi saya, point ini boleh difahami melalui karisma <seingat saya, saya pernah tulis pasal karisma di blog lama. Malas neh mau cari, kamu bongkar sana>. For me, machismo is a matter of interpersonal skills. Some men out there do have the looks, but as they lack the charisma, they turn sour <jahat gila-gila statement>. Well, accept it, dude. You're not hot stuff <hell you, Sven. Wait.... SVEN!?>.

Melalui kata-kata biasa, seorang lelaki yang digelar hot stuff mampu menawan hati wanita. Kalau dia bercakap, mata seorang wanita pasti akan merenung bibirnya, ekspresi mukanya, gerak badan dan matanya. Apapun ceritanya, wanita tadi akan taat mendengar, sebagai alasan untuk terus memerhatikan kecantikan si lelaki. 

Nama lain bagi lelaki sebegini adalah si romantis, pujangga konvensional. Tidak perlu puitit gubahan ayatnya, yang penting dia bersuara, beratus wanita datang berbaris, sekadar untuk mendengar hembus nafas si lelaki tadi <gahh, saya boleh tulis novel lucah oh KASK LOL>. Lelaki berkarisma, kalau cerita pasal dusun buahnya di kampungpun, akan dipandang seksi. Sad thing I don't posses such attribute. OK, move on. Jangan layan sangat saya neh <crying>. Gahh.

7. Funny men are hot

If funny is the scale of man's hotness, then Jim Carrey is certainly the hottest guy around.

Kadang-kadang wanita ni sukar betul difahami. How can humorous guys look sexy!? I cannot brain!!!!!!

Actually, I can. Women are more to entertainment sometimes, and some of them think that sense of humor is a big chunk of entertainment. As women tend to see everything quite meticulous, quite serious, they can easily break down or having conflict <esp. women with career nowadays> within them. At this stage, they really need someone to- at least- erase those dilemmas, just for awhile. And that is why, nowadays, humorous guys always steal the spotlight.

Perfect countenance is nothing, when you lack the inner entity to entertain women <sounds playboy>.

8. Lelaki yang pernah mengalah dalam satu-satu pergaduhan (tapi tidak akan mengalah dalam pergaduhan main-main): jika kamu temuinya, maka cepat-cepat rebut. He's limited version!

We always fight and make peace. It's a circle of which, none
could escape. :D

This is real... maybe. Men have been created to have a higher dose of egoism than women. It is to constantly injects them with the sense of defensiveness from Nature's fury and to protect women <particularly, their possible mate><wait, why I sound so scientific??>.

But then, this is not an excuse for men to have authority upon women. Males are solely to protect, and not control over. Women are humans, ya see. So, we should not shackle them right to the tree of our own desire. Let them go, for women have so many dexterity than any other men have <excluding the Prophets>.

To respond to the point above, I would say, giving up for men is quite a hard thing to do. Whence he raise white flag in his debate with women, he will have the tendency to feel wrecked and worthless. This is not it. The coolest man ever, Prophet Muhammad SAWS never slain those who voiced their opinion in front of him. Yet, he was a strong leader.

So guys, giving up is not a sign of defeat; it is merely a symbolic of strong heart, acceptance towards defeat. Winning over is not the truest glory to man, but winning for. That's what counts. And girl, if you ever, by anyway- meet this kinds of man, grab him. He's the strongest.

9. Men who install retro or ridiculously weird fashions are charismatic

This does occur in America and all over the world. The indie in Malaysia:- is an exemplary for an edited version of retro, metro style. Girls nowadays are crazy about men with checkered shirt and fit jeans, and rug outfits, don't know why. Men with pompadour, quiff, slicked-back hair comb over hairstyles have people's thumb-ups now. The retrogression of hairstyles has brought upon new decadence of black metal, punk whatsoever ridiculous trend. Good thing.

Installing retro style needs a very high confidence. I mean, to walk with those- some would say- nerdy, birdy and boyish looks- really needs high self-esteem. That's why, I prefer to call these guys <the retro guys> as something of confidence, a conviction of a true hero. A manifestation of freedom.

Intrinsically, women prefer over retros because of that. Or is it because of the aesthetic values that this trend has? <Gotta re-think the point>. OK, move on.

10. Lelaki yang fokus satu soalan dengan muka serius adalah comel. Serius.

Saya blushing neh, baca point yang ini <kehh-terasa ndak bertempat>. Hahahah. Above is one example of a guy who focuses on a question by one of his fans. Does man really look beautiful when they focuses on something? <esp., question>. Kamu jawablah sendiri, wanita. Yang neh, saya malas sudah menulis <tunggulah bahagian ke-2>. Wassalam.